Ramblings collage
Ramblings From The Road


Hi Dolls,

So, there's been fire in my life. Thank God it was in 3's. I feel a little safer now. 
The first fire was my best girlfriend's house. An electrical fire on a brand new house. But she has remained so positive that she is a lesson in strength and optimism. 

The second fire we could see from our house. We overlook a hollow and in between our mountain range and the opposite mountain range is a small mountain called Sugarloaf. At the top is the Osborne compound, a very sweet family with a barn full of animals. I was lying in bed with the drapes closed. Matt and Josh were playing pool in the basement. I didn't see the bolt of lightening, but the clap of thunder was the biggest I have heard in my entire life and it rolled and rolled and rolled throughout the hollow. When Matt and Josh came up to the bedroom they opened the drapes and we saw the beginning of a fire on Sugarloaf Mountain. It got bigger and bigger. Matt knew it was Bruce Osborne's house. I picked up the phone, Matt swears I said, what's the number for 911? I swear I said, with the phone in my hand, How do I look? Anyway when I got the guy and told him what was happening the fire had increased. I asked has anybody else called. He said no. I said you better get here fast cause this thing is burning to the ground and it is huge. We got in the car and went to the fire and sure enough it was Bruce's. It's a long mountain driveway. We didn't go up it for fear we'd clog the road for the fire trucks. They didn't show up for 35-40 minutes. We couldn't understand why. We actually had to direct some firefighters to the fire. There were three calls, and rumor has it in town that the guy heard bonfire not barn fire. Can you believe? The whole thing gave me the creeps. When I was a kid my mother and I used to chase ambulances, and go to fires all the time. Morbid fascination I guess. It made me realize we don't have a plan. We've got fire extinguishers in every room of this house, but I don't know how to use them. I also learned you have to do something with them so they work . You can't leave them sitting around the house thinking they're going to spray when you need them. As of this writing we still don't have a plan. I mean how do I get the animals off the roof? If it starts on the second floor how do I find the cat? And how do I keep from freezing or running back in the house for my Norma Desmond turban? I mean shouldn't we all have a plan and then some valium to act on the plan? The Osborne's lost their barn. Nobody was home, thank God. A neighbor let out all the animals, horses, chickens, cows and they only lost two calves. Thank God.

The third fire was a fan. One of his friends told me this gentleman died in a fire in his apartment. I'm a little spooked I guess. Life is fragile. Please remember that and make a plan.

Two restaurant recommendations. When I was in LA for the Hollywood Bowl Hall of Fame I was taken to Off Vine, 6263 Leland Way, Hollywood, CA 323-962-1900. It's in one of the last California bungalows left in LA and it is tasty. I was inducted into the Hollywood Bowl Hall of Fame. Where is the Hollywood Bowl Hall of Fame? Is it next to the Hockey Hall of Fame? Alex Borstein says it's in some rich guy's mind. Anyway, I had a ball. My favorite moment was watching Brian Wilson and Roger Daltrey backstage trading rock and roll war stories. Roger Daltrey gave me his cell phone number - 30 years too late. What a nice man he is and the Smothers Brothers are so, so brilliant. 

I went to my little island in South Carolina and had an altercation with a redneck family... What to do I ask you... what to do? Sell or pull out the Smith and Wesson. I came home and realized there are rednecks everywhere. My second restaurant recommendation is in New York: Frere Jacques it's Fench and get over it. 13 East 37th Street 212-679-9355. I had lunch with my dear friend David Nichtern, composer of "Midnight At The Oasis". Another friend wants me to do a re-mix track for the discos. So I went to David and we just might do it.

Oy... have I rambled or what? good bye.

Love, Patti


Read Previous Ramblings ::